What’s New in Akumal, July 2017

Flash !!!  All the FAKE NEWS that’s fit to print!!!  If you don’t read it here, it’s not the real Fake News!

⇒ Rumor has it that Gabriella Herbert is running for president of Tulum and because of her immense popularity will be a shoe-in.

⇒ Government officials in Playa del Carmen beg North Akumal to abandon their affiliation with Tulum and once more be part of Playa’s jurisdiction .

⇒ Cueva Vodka is #1 seller in Russia.  Bartley Smith’s new venture is heading up betting parlors for Kentucky basketball.

⇒ Melania Trump will be vacationing in Tulum for the month of August.

⇒ Butter, sugar, and coffee now listed as beneficial to one’s diet

While kiteboarding in beautiful Half Moon Bay… local resident Jamie Cost suffered a near-fatal accident which led to the …discovery of the wreck of a WWII submarine.  “Wow!” said Cost, “what a boon for area tourism.  Now people can swim with a sunken U-boat!”

⇒Dredging is scheduled to begin in December to allow entry for cruise ships into Half Moon Bay.  Complimentary swim-with-the-U-boat packages will be offered to passengers.

 

Captions: 1. Bigger is Better! Architect’s rendering of proposed Half Moon Bay condos.  2. Not quite as Big, but definitely an asset to YalKu lagoon…  3.North Akumal restricts height of new construction to 3 stories – let’s call them ‘levels’.

 

⇒ North Akumal becomes an all-adult community.  Locals are hoping nude beaches are not far behind, so to speak.

⇒ Dan Freeman may be challenger to Herbert’s run for President — of Tulum.

⇒ Exchange rates go sky high!  Peso at 45/$1usd and 9€/$1usd!

⇒ Kai Kirk plans to head up Microsoft (or some kind of business in California) by late 2018.  In other business news, Cowboy and Debra are on track to open 8 European franchises of their famous BBQ restaurants .

⇒ New PROFEPA guru Rocio Cue  moves all turtles out of Akumal Bay.  Who knew they’d fit in her pool!

⇒ Mary Henderson is gathering support for her scheme to totally tope all of North Akumal.  Says long-time resident Henderson, “Who needs all these ups and downs!”

 

A word of explanation: One newsletter person is getting a new business off the ground, one suffered a computer crash, one read the entire Hamish Macbeth mystery series this month, and one actually did something relevant to tomorrow’s publication date. 

Akumal Ambulance

Donate to help the Red Cross place a full time ambulance in Akumal to service locals and tourists!

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